How to have the conversation
It might seem hard, but the only way to start the conversation is to ask. You might worry that she will get angry or upset with you for asking, or will not want to talk about it. Don’t take it personally when the reaction is not as you hoped, the most important thing is that first step because she knows that you are there for her.
- Pick a quiet time to talk when the violence is not happening
- Let them talk at their own pace and let them tell as much as they are comfortable with
- If they are not ready to talk, just let them know that you are there if they need you
- Try not to give your opinion, but rather to talk about the things that you have noticed. For example:
- – I’m wondering if everything is OK at home?
- – I noticed that you have some bruises. Did someone do that to you?
- – I have noticed that you seem scared around your partner. Is everything OK?
- – I noticed how they treated you when we were at the BBQ last week. Are you alright?